dreams

I dreamed these social workers had developed a kind of magic soap for people to wash their hands with that would analyse their health and also whether they had been using drugs.

So I tried it out. You soaped your hands and then you held your hands to your ears and the soap talked to you. The soap said I was in pretty good health and also I didn't get too much sunlight so I looked a few years younger than I really am. Also it said I had big boobs (this is relevant in a second).

Then the soap began to explain to me that the Tories had a scheme to round up benefit scroungers and put them in camps, so I needed to stay out of the main quads and also dress to minimise the appearance of my breasts so I didn't attract too much attention.